Good day Beloved.
What does the coming day hold for you? Sometimes we have a good idea of what’s coming and sometimes we do not. A while ago I had the pleasure of talking with someone whom I like and respect a good deal. We talked about a variety of topics and one stuck with me in particular. We talked about how sometimes well-meaning mothers have a really difficult time letting their kids grow up in a way that would be good for them. Sometimes kids are forced into boxes that just don’t fit. Sometimes, like me, kids grow up too fast. I have not been blessed with the opportunity to raise kids so I may not know of what I speak. I would be the first to admit it. So, take this post with a grain of salt OK.
I have known some kids who are differently abled according to society and sometimes they are over protected by moms and dads who don’t want them to get hurt or maybe don’t want to deal with their own embarrassment at having a less than perfect child in the eyes of society. Have you heard the saying that “God doesn’t make mistakes”? I believe it but people do make mistakes every day. As hard as it is I think all children need to have the opportunity to learn from their own mistakes. It can be difficult to learn from their parents’ mistakes because they are the receivers of the consequences usually.
I imagine it is one of the hardest things in the world to stand by and watch your growing child make a wrong choice. Obviously, there are many, many times when you as parent have to step in and protect the child. This is only right and good. When a child is about to make choices that could possibly help them grow in the long run even if there might be a bit of temporary pain right now, is it OK to let them make that choice for themselves?
Science says that children’s brains do not reach maturity or at least a place of being reasonable perhaps until they reach 25 years. I don’t know any 25-year-old that thinks of themselves as a child, yeah. Society lets kids drive at 16, vote at 18, drink at 21. Somehow that doesn’t seem to mesh very well. Some cultures arrange marriages at 7 years old or maybe 10. Some females move into being able to procreate as early as 10 years old. No wonder growing up is so hard.
Growing up is hard to do and hard to watch no matter which side of it you are on. Parents and kids alike get bombarded by conflicting messages at every turn. Really good parents rarely get the recognition and praise they deserve for a job well done. The person I mentioned at the top of this post I consider to be a really good parent. Parents who could use some help get more blame and shame than help.
Oh, how I wish there were an easy, good answer for this situation. I do not know it; I simply share my musings. Beloved I know there are kids who need to begin growing up way to early. There are also kids who are prohibited from growing up way beyond a reasonable age. Bottom line Beloved, growing up is hard to do. It doesn’t matter if the child is 8 or 40 years old when they step onto the road leading to independence. That road is hard no matter what.
Beloved, if you know really good parents, tell them how good they are. If you know parents who could use some help, carefully, respectfully offer your hand. It is good and right to do.
Beloved, have a lovely…
Mona LangmaackMelin
Mona's Monday Musings 